Yes, we all know about monsters. You’re a fool if you haven’t heard of ‘em! But this particular monster is funktastic. He rocks a purple afro with one horn coming through his blue forehead. You can tell this monster has been hurting, when you look into his yellow stained, red pupiled eye sockets you can see fear, sweat, and tears building up. It is said to believe that he is a children snatcher. Yes, he snatches small children. He is seen to ride a 3 wheeled ‘Big Wheels’ bicycle and as he comes snatching your people up, he tosses them into his basket placed on the front of his handlebars. People have seen this 4’7, sex crazed, plump blue creature in the dead of night. Why does he snatch children you may ask? No one knows at all. They have their theories, but are they facts? This, we do not know either.
Bonfunkle has lived on this so called functional planet, for 3 million years. He was around the time period of the Spartans. He even snatched up their children as the Spartans had battle royals. It is said that he came from outer space, if you want, you can call him an African Blue Space Christ, but you don’t have too. This monster is known everywhere. Over in Japan, they call him Bonfunkzilla. In Texas they call him BillyBobBofunk, except Texas despises him. They’ve sent armies out to kill this afrotastic Monk. I don’t know what their deal is.
Bonfunkle even has a Halloween costume out, you’ll always see them rocking that look on October 31st. This creature is a really big phenomenon! So take that Frankenstein..
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